Good evening, it was a long day at school today what with dealing with adult bullies and listening to lots of racial micro aggression (ooh, I found this and it’s so accurate to the point of making me want to punch something) during the Q&A session at a cultural presentation. Yes, it was a day of trying to hold back frustration and anger towards insecure cowards and insensitive jerks.
But that’s not what this post is about.
This post is dedicated to all my blogging friends who have quit blogging. Yesterday marked the day the last person on my ‘favorite bloggers’ sidebar quit blogging. Mallory, Britt, Bailey, Heather, and finally now, Victoria.
It’s a bit sad but at the same time I think these ladies have thought things through and I support their decision wholeheartedly. I, myself, have had countless ‘maybe I should stop blogging’ or ‘blogging is getting stressful’ thoughts.
I’m so immensely glad that I found these ladies even though I’ve never met them in real life before and talking about internet friends is always weird but I loved their blogs, they keep it real all the time and I feel like they would be really lovely people to be friends with in real life.
I’ve had internet friends on Neopets and MapleStory before but sadly, that happened at a time when Twitter wasn’t used often and ways to keep in touch with those people wasn’t something I thought about. Sometimes when I think about those people, I wish I’d done something to keep in touch with them. No, I don’t remember their names/don’t think I even know their full names. I have Tumblr friends now though, mostly people who share the same anime/manga interests as me.
After reading Victoria’s well-written and perfectly-put blog post, I realized that some parts of what she said resonated with me.
I have lost track of the number of times I have used the phrase or variants of the phrase: I’ll be blogging regularly very soon or This blog is not dead yet, don’t worry. When in truth, I really didn’t have much motivation to fire up the blog and post content regularly. I’m also, if you haven’t noticed, a blogger with no specific direction… I suppose they now call it ‘no niche’ or ‘lack of branding’. I’ve never liked the ‘branding’ or ‘niche’ bus. First off, it’s hard for me to think of myself as an ‘expert in my niche’ because I’m multi-passionate, how does one think of one’s self as an ‘expert’ and what makes anyone an ‘expert’ at anything anyway? Second, I just blog about whatever I feel like writing about, like a diary… which is what I thought blogs were originally meant for. For a while, I tried to stick our blog into a box and write for an audience – um, yeah, non-existent one – but that failed quickly and just stressed me out because I was pretending to be someone I wasn’t (cue Mulan soundtrack). I was just fooling myself when I thought I could actually make something out of this blog. After all, this blog – which was and is still a very generous gift from our mom who pays for hosting and other blog-related stuff that until today I still have no idea about – started out as a place where we posted 1 million pictures of bands we liked at those specific points in time. Yeah… (See what I mean with this oddly irregular-length paragraph that would make SEO experts scream? I promise I tried to break the paragraph up but it didn’t seem right.)
But, like Victoria said, I’m not who I was when I started this blog with my sister. At the core, I don’t think people change that much but people do change – likes, dislikes, styles, small yet significant things like that. When I started this blog, I was a high school freshman (at least, that’s how old I was in US school terms lol). This blog turns 8 this month!! Crazy!!! It’s been a really long time and so much has happened, so much has shaped who I am today. This blog’s flow has changed with the times and oh, how nostalgic it gets when I scroll back and look at posts from previous years. This blog is in many ways is a reflection of the process of growing up which is both cool and awkward at the same time. I’m content with the way our blog is now. I’m just writing whenever and whatever I feel like. I can also tell you honestly that not having an audience or getting comments or ‘being popular’ doesn’t bother me. That shiz doesn’t suit me anyway. Wait for my post on not having any friends (though when I usually say ‘wait for this or that post, I overthink or abandon it quickly so we’ll see).
A memoir is a good idea though who knows if it will ever be complete… I’ve tried to start one a dozen times but the most I’ve gotten is maybe 2 or 3 paragraphs then it all goes downhill from there because my emotions and thoughts go all over the place and I can’t focus on the direction I plan on going.
Anyway, I just want to tell my ex-blogging friends: keep on keeping on and staying true to yourself, and thanks for acknowledging the existence of this awkward potato.
Thanks for reading (probably just Google bots, if I really think about it).
Also, the post title is totally a RyeoWook song title because RyeoWook just left for his mandatory military service. We’ll wait for you, Wookie.