Good afternoon. As I write this, it’s 3PM, we just came back from having pizza and now I’m sitting here, wondering where all the time has gone.
2014 is ending? But how? Isn’t that usually the question I ask at the end of the year?
So how did 2014 treat me? There were ups and downs and loop-d-loops and I probably came out a bit more different than I expected. I think I did a lot less than I intended to but I learned a lot more. To put it simply, 2014 has been a year of trying + discovering new things and unintentionally dropping some things.
Mostly it started with our move. Vancouver seems like light years away. When I think back on those days, it almost seems like it happened in a previous life. We started 2014 in Vancouver and honestly? It sucked. Well, there, I said it. Our time in Vancouver sucked. It was like a punch in the gut. My motivation went right out the door along with my hope that things would be different. I stopped drawing, I stopped doing nail art, I stopped working out, even my writing kind of stalled, and I felt like utter crap (understatement).
It just wasn’t doing any of us good so my sister and I decided to apply to the college we had originally planned on going to. It was stressful applying so late but we got it done and we were accepted. We left Vancouver at the end of April. Looking back… well, I can’t really say much about it except occasionally I think about the fish and chips shop we used to eat at weekly, the gorgeous sakura trees I walked past every day on the way to the bus stop, the 3 snow days we saw, and the sushi place we went to whenever we didn’t feel like having fish and chips. Oh, and my astronomy class. Um, yeah.
Highlights: getting to see our first snow. It was more beautiful than I imagined and I had so much fun playing in the snow. So much so that I almost forgot about how crappy it was there.
We went home for summer. With that, those 4 months were over. Summer was a lot of things but mostly ignorant bliss and eating out and getting to see our pup. I also worked for a couple of weeks at a customer service department. It was interesting if not boring (long hours) and draining (reading complaints every single day is mentally exhausting, no kidding). The best part was getting to have lunch with one of my friends from high school every week since we were both in the same area. Towards the end of summer, there was a lot of packing and stressing out from packing and planning for school. I would put up some pictures from summer but my phone went kaput a few weeks into summer.
I let Vancouver hold me back for too long. I didn’t even realize that I was way down in the dumps until one day I woke up and thought to myself, ‘oh my god, I think I’m a bit depressed’. I didn’t want to do anything and I was just going through the motions. I was lost and tired. Kicking myself out of that funk wasn’t easy and admittedly sometimes I still think I need to haul myself further out. Lesson learned: don’t let a place and/or its people drag you down.
August was crazy. Settling into a whole new place was challenging (probably an understatement seeing as we were kind of homeless for 3 weeks) but we managed somehow and we moved into an apartment. The running around didn’t stop there and in-between going to school, it was wild and hectic. Looking back, of course it doesn’t seem as stressful but it was. I have that experience to thank for making me more knowledgeable and realizing that I’m more capable of handling ‘adult’ stuff than I thought. Lesson learned: you are capable of a great many things but at the same time, you are enough.
But school has been okay, we’ve made some friends, we know our way around campus, we did some volunteer work that I’m proud of, we know most of the streets around our area like the back of our hand, we’ve found places we enjoy going to (yes, this includes Costco), we finally don’t live in a tiny bunker under someone else’s house (aka in Van and lol rent wasn’t cheap either), we’re close to San Francisco (which is, duh, my favorite place) and Disneyland (which we have yet to get annual passes to hehe), we’ve got a car now.
I also turned 21 this month. I would say it was a quiet affair but it was definitely a bigger thing than last year. My mom and sister took me out for a nice lunch and we even had dessert – a decadent brownie topped with ice cream and nuts aka my favoritest dessert evar – which we don’t really do on other days. At night, we went to our favorite dim sum place which is this cozy hole-in-the-wall that we like to call our spot. I had cake too. Haha, how my mom and sister spoil me. On the same day, our Thanksgiving haul from Target arrived so that was a bonus.
Again, my mom and sister (aka ninja gift givers and surprise experts) managed to surprise me with their presents. I wasn’t expecting anything at all – I’m happy just having dinner with people I love – but I should’ve if the past years have been any indication of their surprise skillz. My sister presented me with a piece of art she drew for me and what makes it beautiful and special is the meaning behind each drawing. My mom got me a locket with three charms inside (all of the charms hold a special meaning) and it’s amazing. Jeez, I’m gonna have to work extra hard to top their surprises for their birthdays. 😉
No alcohol has been consumed since then. I’m fun that way.
Blogging wise, I’ve been less motivated this year but I feel like the few posts I did write were very real and keep true to our tagline haha. Who knows if 2015 will finally be the year we clean the heck out of this blog and work on it twice as hard? But then again what’s the fun in blogging if it becomes a chore? Heh, we’ll see if any blogging goals make it to my 2015 goals (if I even make a list).
2014 was the year I tried to get with the times in terms of social media. I made an Instagram account and discovered that I would rather play Sudoku than Instagram. It’s boring and the only account that I truly love is Snoopy. I should probably follow more people and get into it but no, really, it’s boring. A bunch of edited pictures, yay, the end. Maybe it’s just me…
OH. I almost forgot. We watched K: Missing Kings this year. I think that calls for more cake or something. Season 3 is coming next year. More champagne, more cake.
I said in my 2013 review that I wished that I learned to drive. Well, it wasn’t so much as learning to drive than getting my license but I did it. I’ve got a California’s driver’s license and honestly?? It feels amazing. Sometimes it still doesn’t feel real. I can drive. It’s a big deal to me haha.
Yeah, I guess 2014 has had its moments, good and bad. I stumbled and fell and it took me longer to get back on my feet but I’m grateful for everything I’ve learned this year and for the less pleasant things, I will chalk them up to experience and grow from there.
So I’ll be myself and you’ll be yourself,
I really don’t think it’s something we have to start over from the beginning to find – Rashisa, Super Beaver
I am currently obsessed with Rashisa by Super Beaver from the anime Barakamon (one of the most touching and eye-opening shows I’ve watched this year). Reading the lyrics, I feel that the song was written for me (hello cheesy me). This year I’ve struggled with accepting and finding myself. I’ve had moments where I just drift off into unpleasant thoughts and wonder if I’m happy with who I am now and think of how much better I liked the old me. It hasn’t been easy admitting to myself that I’ve been living in the past instead of moving forwards. Which is why I’m grateful for my sister and mom who have been nothing but supportive of me. They’ve put up with my crap and they see the best in me when I can’t. With that, I would like to declare Rashisa my song of 2014 and my theme going into 2015.
Here’s to being ourselves whoever that may be and let’s meet again next year!
P.S: Of course it’s so me to write a post that could have been halfway organized and that could have used more pictures. Oh well.